Real Fake News

Hey, here are some ONION type headlines to choke on. Enjoy, they dont smell too bad.

-Deaf Gossip Columnist Seeing Signs That Britney Is Ready To Date Again
-Grotesquely Obese Man Accepts Fate As Inadvertent Health Club Spokesman
-Amateur Photographer Discovers Talent In Euphemisms
-George Harrison's Remains Discovered In Thrift Store, Bought For $1.75
-Environment Friendly Fire Alarm Remains Perfectly Silent
-Americans Remember The President After Nixon And The One Before Carter
-Book Club Not The Same Without Oprah's Approval